I really do not know how to start this blog but I just know that I must. In the previous blog to this one I went out on a limb (something I don’t always do) and described a TV series of 11 episodes, followed by 11 movies that continued to play off the original series. The limb I went out on was to recommend anyone reading my blog, should if possible try to find the series episodes and movies, and watch them if at all possible. If you are confused at this point I invite you to read my previous blog posting, titled the same as above, and read it for clarification.
Now I can once again state in this paragraph I really do not know how to continue with this blog or even if I can exit my comfort zone of the big, sometimes ornery, usually outspoken, overly opinionated, gruff, and a zillion other descriptive adjectives that would probably fit me quite well. None of which I cherish to admit to, however that description of me has to precede the rest of this blog.
I found something in myself watching these 22 flicks that I always knew was in me, but as we tough exterior guys, prefer to hide. I don’t even know how to describe it but I must try.
Kathleen and I watched all 22 together, we could laugh together when laughing was in order, we could (maybe not right away) , compare notes about what we had just watched. Kathleen could openly cry when crying was in order, I could look away from her as we sat together on the couch watching while raising an arm to conceal the tears running down my cheeks. And —- that is how we enjoyed the TV time.
Later, I found that I could recall bits and pieces of an episode, but I desired to be sure I hadn’t missed anything, so I took to watching them over and over, and yes each time I saw the episode or movie again, I saw things I missed. I can not for some reason get enough of watching them over and over where as Kathleen lets me do my thing as she plays on her computer and ignores what I am up to.
I honestly do not know how to analyze my behavior, other than perhaps it has something to do with the crazy feelings and emotions that someone like me ( gruff, ornery, outspoken, opinionated, ) has while and after watching these brutally honest life changing episodes/movies.
The watching of these has taken place following a very confusing time in history for someone like me. Someone content with the direction of the world around me for the past four years and looking forward to that comfort to continue for perhaps the rest of the time this 76 year old (me) has left on this planet, only to have the very recent past ripped out from under with a changing of the guard, and an equally confusing time with a flu/pandemic that I preferred to call a PLANDEMIC.
Remember, I’m tough, It’s easier to be pissed, angry, willing to verbally kill, and striking out at any little thing or sentence that someone puts forth in Face Book. That to me became my refuge, my comfort place with all the hurt and hate I was experiencing.
I started to watch Signed, Sealed, Delivered ( all 22 offerings ) over and over. I found I could put all the anger, and desire to strike out, on the back burner if not for just a while but maybe even longer, if I could wrap myself around what was happening in the lives of four unlikely unique characters like, Oliver, Norman, Rita, and Shane. These four while facing the challenges of finding not only the person who wrote a long lost letter, but trying to deliver it to whom it was written to, and the twists and turns that could take along the way to those involved, but more than that, how the lives of the four became more and more interwoven as events moved forward with the challenges entrusted to them.
This became a powerful release for me. To watch them over and over and let my emotions pour out as each episode dictated. I know that some people who read my blog do not have perhaps the capability to access the 22 episodes and some who do. have no desire to seek them out and that is fine. I understand. I am just content to know what four people, their lives, and their adventures, have meant to me.
I don’t know when I will discontinue watching them over and over but one thing for sure, I know that I desire to become a more mellow person and I believe eventually that may happen.
The world can only hope so.